Schools closed till March 27, 2020 due to Corona virus

Governor Ducey announced closure of schools till March 27, 2020.

Next week is Spring Break, so an extended Spring Break.

This is a news that would have made all the teachers and students happy, if the circumstances were normal.

Now, it just scares us more. Is corona virus really a serious thing?

How will I keep my family safe?

I guess I will just read more news and join more groups to know what is going on.

It's cold!

"Mommy, it's cold", said Aadi. I was surprised to see him lying on the couch with a blanket on him.
I touched his forehead. It was burning. I went to get the thermometer. "It's 102", I told my husband. He said give him some Tylenol. It was Sunday afternoon. I gave him Tylenol. After few hours he got worse, with coughing and runny nose.

"It's flu. One of the kids in his school had flu. Let's go to the urgent care". I was dreading the long wait at urgent care but I  decided to get my son checked. When we reached the hospital. There were just two cars in the parking lot. There were no patients there. It was relieving to know that we won't have to wait for hours. We checked in and waited for the provider.

"Aadi", called the nurse. We went inside. The nurse did his exam. Checked his weight, height, oxygen levels and  blood pressure. After few minutes provider came in. She got him tested for flu. She also said that his oxygen level was low and his heart rate was really high." This could be due to fever, but I want to check if he has pneumonia or not." His flu test came positive. His fever was now 103F.
She ordered a chest X-ray and told us that she was going to give him double dose of Tylenol, to see if his fever goes down and his heart rate becomes normal.

The nurse gave him the medicine, within few minutes, he was throwing up and he got worse. Provider got scared and told us to take him to emergency.

We went to emergency. There, the doctor asked us a lot of questions. Then gave him medicine for nausea, Tylenol and tamiflu. They observed him for couple hours. They gave him Gatorade to drink.
When his heart rate was normal, they sent us home with prescriptions for tamiflu and nausea medicines.

It was a sad day for me. Seeing my kid sick and then seeing him get worse. It's a sickening feeling. You always want good for your kids, but somethings are not in your hands.

Happy New Decade!!

Today is the last day of this decade. One more day and we will step into a brand new decade.

Looking back, this decade has been very significant for my life. Some major events happened in my life, which changed my life.

2010 was a very important year, as this year changed my status from a wife to a mom. Yes, my son was born in 2010.  

2011 was the worst year of my life, as I lost my mom in 2011. It was a devastating event for me. I haven't fully recovered from it, even till now.

These two events are the major ones, which changed my life forever. One added something to my life and one took something from me.

There were other things too that happened during this decade. My husband and I bought our house. We got our house in 2016. Its a good house and I am happy with our decision.

Can you imagine, I changed five jobs in one decade. Wow! I didn't realize this.I know that's a lot of jobs. 

Ten years is a long time. We do so many things everyday, and going down the memory lane, you realize you only remember the important things. I don't remember the time at my work, but I do remember the time spent with my family. We are so much focused on our jobs that sometimes we ignore our families (unknowingly). In the long run, family is the most important thing in our lives.

Happy New Decade to all of you. I wish your new decade is much better than the last ones.

I have Superpowers!

“Beep, Beep, Beep!” I barely open my eyes and look at my phone. It’s my morning alarm. Not believing what I see, I press the snooze and go back to sleep. After ten minutes, it beeps again and I get up scratching my head. Its 6:00 a.m. and my day has begun.

I come out of the shower and try to hurry up. I start the coffee, chop some onions, jalapeno, and bell peppers for the omelet. I put the bread in the toaster, take out the plates and cook the omelet. I take out the lunch boxes and make the salad for my husband and me to take to work. I put the salad in the lunch boxes, omelet on the plates and pour the coffee in the mugs. I set the table for breakfast and then I realize that it’s 7 o’clock.

“Wake up, Aadi. Today is Tuesday, time to go to school.” You guessed it right. That’s my adorable son. He is 8 but behaves like a 5-year-old. He opens his eyes and says no, I smile and tell him, mommy is getting late to work. I give him his hearing aids. He puts them on and runs to the restroom. I get dressed for work and when he comes out from the restroom, I help him get ready and check his backpack. I leave his room telling him, “wear your shoes, take your backpack and go and eat breakfast.”

“Its 7:25, I don’t want to be late. I will take my breakfast in a box. You can eat breakfast with Aadi”, I tell my husband. “Its everyday thing for you, okay, be safe”, He tells me and he is right, I hardly ever get a chance to eat breakfast with them.

“Mom!” Aadi runs and gives me a hug as soon as I enter his classroom to pick him up after work. His teacher tells me about what they did during the day, “Today we did additions. He did well.” We come home and Aadi starts playing with his toys. “Noodles?” Aadi asks me and I tell him, “Yes, mom is going to cook noodles. Do you want a cookie?” He says yes and I give him two cookies and water and start cooking the noodles.

“Aadi, how was your day?” asks my husband as soon as he comes home. I ask him what you want me to cook for dinner. He says “anything”. I decide the dinner menu on my own and start prepping for it.

“Aadi, let’s go and study”, I tell my son, as it is the time I spend with him working on his homework and teaching him new things. “Not now”, he says but goes to his room to get the notebooks and pencils for the study time.

“Okay, put your I-pad away and its time to go to bed, its 8 o’clock”, I tell my son and he puts down his I-pad and runs to his playroom to get some toys and he goes to his room. I go with him, help him put his hearing aids in the box and rub his forehead softly until he falls asleep. Its 8:30 p.m. and I am tired now, I turn on the TV and this is the first time in the day that I get to relax. My husband is in his home office. I watch TV for a while and then load the dishes in the dishwasher. Now it’s time to go to bed and get ready for another day.

I am a working mom and I feel guilty about it. I know I am a working mom by choice but that doesn’t stop me from feeling sad about it. As a working mom, I have chosen a hard life for me. I get up at 6:00 in the morning and go to bed around 10 at night. All these waking hours I am working. Life as a working mom is hard. It’s like working two jobs plus a load of guilt. You must be thinking why I feel guilty. After my pregnancy, I went back to work when my son was just one month old. He has been with babysitters until he started going to preschool. I feel guilty because I am not there if he has any activities during school time, as I am at work. I miss so many events while other parents are there with their kids.

You must also be wondering why I chose a hard life for me. The answer is not that simple. I am from India, a male dominated society, where not very long ago, the girls were not even sent to schools. They never got a chance to get educated. Their main purpose in life was to get married and take care of their families. I have never liked this idea. I am lucky that I was brought up in a family where I got a chance to get my education. I have a Master’s Degree and I am a working woman.

Since, I got a chance which most women don’t get, I don’t want to let that go to waste. I am working to show the Indian women, that women can work, they can take care of their kids, they can do all. Yes, they have superpowers.

“For women, working is not just about money, it’s about becoming independent”, I tell my husband. “It gives you freedom, you are no longer required to ask for each and everything from someone else.” He agrees with me, well that’s what I like about him that he cares for the issues which are important to me. 

I think I will keep working and keep feeling guilty. I know I love my son and I am doing everything I can to give him a good life.

Before going to bed, I go to my son’s room and kiss him saying in my heart, “I love you and will always love you”.

I want to Live!

I never thought about death all my life. It never occurred to me that I can die. I am young and so for me death and young don’t go together. It’s not that I am stupid or ignorant because I have seen lots of people die at young age, some even in my family circle. I guess my thinking was more of a mindset for me to protect me from fearing death or even thinking about death.

I am a married woman in my thirties and have one six year old child. I am an educator and my life is kind of boring with all day work and then come home and relax and spend time with my family. It’s the same routine every day. 

Last month everything changed, my whole mindset changed and my life has not been the same since. It was a Sunday and I was feeling feverish and I told my husband that I don’t think I can go to work tomorrow. He said I should apply for leave, but he didn’t think it was very bad. I didn’t apply for leave and thought maybe I will be okay in the morning. Next morning, my fever was high and I felt very sick so I had to call-in. I took some ibuprofen and had lots of fluids but the fever won’t go away. I started coughing very soon. I went to see a doctor in urgent care, she tested me for flu, but it was negative. So, she told me to take ibuprofen and rest. I did that for the rest of the week. I was not getting any better, I was getting worse. I went to work on Friday, but my supervisor saw me and she was like she had seen death. I was coughing very badly and had difficulty in talking. She sent me back home within an hour. I went home and rested but with coughing it was hard to rest. My husband was taking care of me and my son all this time.  He kept telling me to eat something but it was very hard for me to eat anything. I did have little bit of soup but I couldn’t eat anything else. I had lost lot of weight.

On Saturday, I texted my siblings about my health, they all had one opinion that I should go to another doctor. So, I went to the urgent care again. I saw the same doctor, when she saw me she panicked. It was like she had seen death just like my supervisor. My oxygen level was very low. She hooked me to the oxygen but she said that she thought I had Pneumonia and she sent me with a nurse to the ER next to that urgent care. I was really scared at that moment. I was in tears. I looked at my husband, he looked devastated. I knew I was dying. I couldn’t think of anything. My son was with a babysitter at this time. I was missing him. It was a terrible feeling, a feeling my mind had protected me from all this time. All I could think was that I didn’t want to die. I wanted to live. I wanted to see my son grow up and go to college, get married, have kids. I didn’t want to see my husband so broken and lost.

I was taken to ER in a wheel chair. They tested me for a variety of things. I was in ER going through these tests and wondering what was going on with me. I was worried about my son and husband. I was worried about my parents. I was seeing my whole life in my mind like a movie. Looking back, I can say that was the worst day of my life.

After all the tests, doctor told me that I had multiple strains Pneumonia. It was really bad and they wanted to keep me in the hospital. My oxygen levels were very low, they didn’t want me to go home and then come back if something bad happened. I was in the hospital for few days.  My husband and my six-year-old son were very worried. My son was in an alert mode. I had never seen him like that. Whenever a nurse or any other hospital person came in the room, he was telling them that mommy is sick. He was not able to sleep. My husband had to take him outside for a while to get him to sleep around 1 in the morning. First night in the hospital was terrible. Next day, when doctor came to visit, he said I had to stay in the hospital for few days. My fever was still not down and I was dependent on oxygen tubes. I got better in few days and went home. It took me three weeks after that to gain my strength to go back to work.

After that incident, my life has changed. I am not careless about myself. I don’t think that I can’t die. I live my life feeling blessed and realizing that I want to live. I can die but I want to live!